Sacrifice and Achievement

Recently I had the pleasure of speaking to a young lady who took her responsibilities as a mother very seriously. Though tertiary educated, talented and confident, she had recently taken an overnight job at a local supermarket filling shelves in order to help the family budget. Although she could have easily taken a better paying day job by putting her children into professional care, she refused to do so on the grounds that it was her job to raise and train her small children, not others. She would make the sacrifice so that they didn’t need to. A helpful young dad was certainly a bonus in making it all work.

I know many young mums making a similar sacrifice, putting careers on hold so that their children have the best possible chance to grow up healthy in mind and spirit as well as body.

In his book “The Reason for God”, Tim Keller describes parenthood this way:

“Children come into the world in a condition of complete dependence. They cannot operate as self-sufficient, independent agents unless their parents give up much of their own independence and freedom for years. If you don’t allow your children to hinder your freedom in work and play at all, and you only get to your children when it doesn’t inconvenience you, your children will grow up physically only. In all sorts of other ways they will remain emotionally needy, troubled and over-dependent. The choice is clear. You can either sacrifice your freedom or theirs.”

I am constantly disturbed, as I watch the nightly news, by the overwhelming and growing number of ‘emotionally needy and troubled’ youth. They will soon be outnumbering the ‘self-sufficient, independent agents’ in classrooms, making teaching an increasingly hazardous occupation. How sad!

 

Children don’t need more education, special programs, welfare, money, therapy, counselors  or skate parks. They need a mum and a dad who are there when they need them, especially the first 5 years of life, at least. It’s not long, in the grand scheme of a life, and your sacrifice may well lead to your greatest achievement: strong, independent sons and daughters.

 

"Great achievement is usually born of great sacrifice, and is never the result of selfishness." Napoleon Hill

Girls and Horses: To buy or not to buy

It seems every young girl at some time in her childhood has a love affair with horses and many a parent has had to tolerate endless begging for a ‘pony of my own’. I was one of them. Now I’m a grown up lady and my love affair endures but my sympathy and understanding is for parents of today who wonder if they should actually embark on what will ultimately be the  huge investment in time and money of a ‘pony of my own’. 

Let me give you some guidelines.  There are two kinds of horse lovers:

            The first one is the girl who just wants to ride. She can’t wait to get onto a horse, feel the thrill of power and grace underneath her, be admired by watching parents and friends……, then go home. It is all about the riding. Under no circumstances buy this girl a horse. The love affair will not last, probably melting away in the warm glow of a boy’s admiring gaze. You will be left with a very expensive pet in a paddock, with equally expensive gear gathering dust in the shed. Just visit a riding school and hire now and again.

            The second girl just wants to be around horses and the riding is a bonus. She will arrive at lessons 10 mins before the instructor and will stay 20 mins after, just leaning on the gate gazing at every graceful move of this beautiful animal. She will gladly groom mud encrusted coats and tails, shovel poo, clean leather, catch, saddle, sponge and rug her own horse and keep her tack spotless. You might as well start saving for a pony for this child as her love affair is not a phase: it will be a lifelong passion.

 

           So what’s in it for you, you may be wondering, apart from the obvious let up in nagging and a very happy child. From my own experience over many years, here is just a sample of what you will get from your investment:  more….

• resilience
• courage (“courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway” John Wayne)
• responsibility
• confidence (it is no small thing to gain the control and respect of a big and powerful animal)
• independence
• immunity from negative peer group pressure
• focus and good behaviour at school
• good health, posture and muscle tone

           ….. and less ….

• time social networking
• vulnerability to early sexual behaviour, alcohol and drugs (horses are better!!)
• self-centredness ( her horse’s need for food, rest and comfort will come before hers)
• slavery to fashion ( her favourite outfit will forever be jeans and boots)
• oh and so much more!!!

 So you see, a ‘pony of my own” for the right girl at the right time is actually a very good investment, both financially as well as in character building.

And one last piece of advice. If you are not at all horsey yourself, seek out a good pony club or instructor to guide you through the journey. You will need a lot of help to keep your girl and her pony safe and healthy.

Have fun.

Thank Heaven for Little Girls

As I watched my 4 granddaughters playing ‘house’ in the backyard cubby last weekend I could feel my heart strangely warmed. The whole scene had a look of being just as it ought: little girls copying mummy and preparing for their own families one day. You can travel to any continent in the world and you will see little girls playing this game, which clearly indicates that homemaking and motherhood is part of our DNA.

Now, lest I lose my feminist readers, let me say that I was of the first generation that encouraged girls to pursue their education beyond high school, for which I am deeply grateful. Also, we will be doing everything we can to encourage and support ALL of our grandchildren’s education, just as we did their parents. (After all, I was a teacher!)
BUT, I part company with the modern feminist who denigrates fulltime motherhood as an occupation unworthy of an intelligent woman.

Firstly, I see motherhood and the making of a happy home as a calling, if not a career. It does not require a university degree, but it wouldn’t hurt if it did, such is the challenge and importance of raising healthy, confident and secure children to adulthood.

Secondly, if nurturing the young and making a happy home is part of our DNA, it is quite unkind to shame young women out of it by questioning their intelligence. The expectations on young mums to desert the home are immense, and those who do are rarely given the respect and encouragement they deserve. They deserve medals! School teachers would line up to deliver them.

Thirdly, as I have said before, our whole future as a nation depends on the women of Australia building homes as safe havens and raising healthy, happy children. Not only are our schools employing more and more welfare coordinators and psychologists, but our hospitals and prisons are bulging with young adults who are dysfunctional and desperately unhappy. Today’s children will either build our nation or bleed it.

So encourage your little girls when they play house and give them a healthy understanding of their God-given, awesome responsibility of bearing and raising children. By all means encourage them to study and learn… the smarter our future homemakers the better… but to also understand ‘timing’ and ‘priority’. Perhaps this way we will also have healthy and happy mums.

Inspire Me

Dreamers inspire me.

I’m not just talking about the big visionaries and go-getters, but the ordinary folk, the quiet achievers with a dream they pursue with equal amounts of joy, determination and diligence. It’s their passion that inspires; the light in their eyes, the enthusiasm in their voice, the brightness of their countenance and posture when they share their dream. I can’t get enough of it, whatever they do.

But they take some finding, as they often pursue their dreams with such focus and intent that they have no time for the usual consumer driven pursuits of the ‘passionless’ nor the idle chatter of the ‘aimless’. To find these dreamers you definitely need to be a ‘there-you-are’ sort of person, entering new relationships and conversations armed with a few good questions such as “what do you enjoy doing with your free time?’ or , ‘what are your dreams for the future?” If you’ve been honing your listening skills up till then you’ll end up being inspired, guaranteed. You will definitely learn something.

 It really doesn’t matter what a person’s dream is, whether it’s growing, restoring or building things, learning, mastering or teaching a skill, righting wrongs or healing hurts. I don’t believe one person’s dream is more valuable or important than any one else’s. It is a part of who God made us to be, a signpost to our purpose, our contribution to the world.

I have recently been inspired by a missionary whose dream is to help relieve poverty in Eastern Europe;

a farmer who dreams of returning farms, animals and people to their natural state of good health;

a Philippines teacher of the deaf who is helping them become self-supporting;

a young gardener who grows and preserves her own food;

lots of young mums providing safe, nurturing homes for their little ones in a world becoming increasingly averse to traditional family values;

volunteer firefighters, CRE teachers, Kids Hope mentors, mental health and elderly carers;

a high school chaplain who loves and cares for unhappy, confused teenagers;

These dreamers lift my heart when it becomes heavy with too much of the ‘nightly news’. They remind me that all is NOT bad in the world

So pursue those dreams, fan those passions. Someone like me will love hearing about it and be inspired.

Let the Teachers Teach

In the current climate of school and teacher bashing, I think it’s time we looked at a missing element in the debate, that of ‘where teacher responsibility ends, and parenting begins.

It seems to me that teachers are taking the blame for all that is wrong in our schools and yet the odds are heavily stacked against them being able to do their job well.

Just to be clear and state the obvious, it is a school’s job to educate and a teacher’s job to teach. At least, that’s what we used to believe. Nowadays a school is seen as a business, the teacher as the customer service provider and the parent ‘the customer who is always right’. If little Johnny is not deliriously happy while getting straight A's then the company will certainly be taken to task, sued if necessary.  Boards will devise and deliver new policies to be carried out, politicians will demand  new courses be written, screeds of papers will have to be read, professional development done, reports written  and endless meetings held to ‘talk about it’.

This has got to stop if our schools are going to improve and our children reach their full potential. Choose any school in the top bracket (Finland, Singapore, Hong Kong) and you will find that teachers are given great respect by parent, students and the community (including media). They are trusted by parents to do the job of educating and make sure their children turn up prepared with the right attitudes.

 What has happened to us? When did we stop training our own children and expect schools and teacher’s to take on the responsibility?

It is not the teacher’s job to ensure each child eats properly and has his fruit for lunch… it is the parents’.

It is not the teacher’s job to make sure she plays nicely at recess… it is the parents’.

It is not the teacher’s fault if a child is a bully or bullied at school… it is the parents’ job to teach him to be kind and empathetic, to know when to ‘use his words’ and ‘walk away’, and when to be assertive when someone steps into his personal space. (a little defense tactic from Dad wouldn’t go astray)

It is not the teacher’s job to check that each child is properly dressed, fed, alert and prepared for a day’s learning… it is the parents’. The best teacher in the world is going to have a hard time holding the attention of a child who started the day with 2 hours of TV and a sugary cereal.

Parents, it is too easy to pass the difficult job of parenting onto teachers and then blame them for not properly educating them. They cannot do both jobs.

If we want better schools, we have to do our part. Many of today’s teachers can only dream about the lessons they would love to teach if only they had the time

 

 

Contentment

I am writing today on a luxurious cruise ship sailing down the Rhine River feeling decidedly wealthy, among 170 other passengers who would fit the same category. The truth is, most on board are pretty average working people who have 3 things in common; they have worked hard, saved their money and stayed married, over the long haul.

In today’s materialistic world, the temptation to get-rich-quick and enjoy wealth NOW is greater than ever. Modern advertising and retailing is masterful in making us continually hungry, dissatisfied and discontent. They want us to always want more.

The trouble with wanting more is that it is NEVER satisfied. “You say, 'If I had a little more, I should be very satisfied.' You make a mistake. If you are not content with what you have, you would not be satisfied if it were doubled.”    Charles Spurgeon

Which brings me to where I should have started, and that is to define wealth.
Yes, it can mean ‘much money’, but it can also mean ‘an abundance of something’.

Is the millionaire whose wife just walked out more wealthy than the 70 yr old pensioner with ‘his girl’ still on his arm?
Is the tycoon with an estranged son more wealthy than a young Dad whose 5 yr old leaves a love note on his pillow?

It seems to me that the person, of any age, who can say “I am content” is the wealthiest of all. To break the power of ‘wanting more’ from forever distracting you from ‘enjoying today’ is to be wealthy indeed.

I can be on the Rhine or in my garden, and I am content.
I can be listening to a Strauss waltz in Vienna or a blackbird’s song from my clothesline, and I am content.

My contentment is not defined by my bank account, the number of clothes in my closet, the labels on their collars or my peers‘ opinions. It is not dependent on the dollar, the stock exchange, real estate values, the government, a politician’s budget or my wage compared to your wage.

My contentment is a choice of my heart and the result of having a ‘right mind’. If I first pursue the kingdom of God and Godly wisdom, everything else falls into place.  (Matthew 6:25-34)

Contentment is the beginning of wealth, as it makes you the master not the slave, the possessor not the possessed, the wise not the foolish.

Times Tables: the Confidence Key at school

Some people may say the title of this blog is stretching the truth just a tad, but I’m not so sure.

Having taught primary age children for 20 years and tutored teenagers in Maths, there seems to me a direct correlation between a child’s learning confidence and his ability to master the times tables. Put simply:

Confidence with times tables = confidence with Maths = confidence with learning everything. Double that with boys (most are right brained and this is their forte). When a boy is confident in Maths he feels capable of anything and that confidence spills over into all subjects. And vice versa. Times Tables are as important to Maths as the alphabet is to reading.

Times tables are the foundation stone of all maths, from simple multiplication and division, to fractions, measurements, algebra and right thru to calculus. Students hit fractions big time in year 7 and 8 and it is almost impossible to master them without tables. This is often the chapter and the time when a student will come crashing to a painful and humiliating halt in maths, confidence starts spiraling down, behaviour and concentration often going with it. ….all for the lack of mastering times tables.

So here is my advice to parents who don’t want to spend their hard-earned cash on maths tutors in high school:  drill those times tables into your kids while they’re young. The time you spend will pay you back in bucket loads, mostly with the satisfaction and pleasure you will get in seeing your child enjoy school and learning. So

• Have a ‘Times Table of the month”
• Invent prizes for every Times Table mastered
• Use car time to drill (kids actually enjoy little ‘tests’)
• Don’t try and learn all 12 in one go. Just four at a time is best, and stay on them for at least a week.     eg just the hard ones of each table

                        3 x 6

                        3 x 7

3 x 8

3 x 9

• Stick a chart on the toilet door and circle the week’s four.
• And finally, DON’T just buy a Times Tables cd and stick it on whenever hoping the kid will learn it by osmosis. Believe me, this is time and money wasted and you’ll still end up paying for a tutor in High School. Times Tables are still learnt best the old-fashioned way… spoken and drilled.

Having it all

The idea of a woman being able to ‘have it all’  has been around for some time and it amazes me that each new batch of young mums still seem to think it is actually possible.

If there was one thing I would say to every young woman attempting to balance the perfect marriage/ perfect children/ perfect career it’s this… don’t forget the ‘Law of Limitations’. Most of what we really need is limited, especially time and energy, …when it is used up, it is gone. No matter how clever, young, popular, beautiful or rich you are, you will not get more than 24 hours a day nor 7 days in a week. Ditto for the amount of energy you have from waking till sleep.

G.K. Chesterton said  “Every act of will is an act of self-limitation…., of self-sacrifice. When you choose anything, you reject everything else.

Eg. When we choose to marry, we reject all other men in our lives

When we choose to have children, we sacrifice freedom and independence and self-interest.

Of course, most of us gladly make these sacrifices because of the love, joy and fulfillment it brings. But, we all have THOSE DAYS when it seems the sacrifice is too great. Money gets tight, kids get fractious and their endless need for love and discipline is just so draining. The wait for rewards is just too long. (20 years) .

“I want more than this” we say, and “I have a right to seek fulfillment and a few extra comforts.” (not sure what right that is!!)

I have watched young mums returning to work for quite a few years now and read their stories on Facebook, in the media and watched on television. The stories are all so similar…”I AM SO TIRED!!!”. They have hit the ’law of limitations’, used up their energy and time,  and the rewards are just not there. If anything, they AND their family have lost their peace, contentment and joy for a pitiful amount of money. (which, by the way, is not the government’s problem nor responsibility)

So what is the answer?

Firstly, I actually DO believe it IS entirely possible to ‘have it all’, just NOT all at once.

Having a perfect marriage and family takes time and effort and sacrifice, lots of it, and if you scrimp on it you will be sorry. To make it work well, you need to “reject everything else” for a time. The length of that time depends on your energy levels and your family’s needs. If going back to work is stressing you, it’s too soon.

I went back to my career at age 40, when my kids were in high school, and we ALL thrived. I had 20 years to work and loved every single minute of it.

Secondly, I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss the challenge and stimulation of my career while raising my family. There are dozens of ways to satisfy that longing…I did it through voluntary work in the church (work that actually counted to my first employers). There are equally as many ways to stretch the family dollar.

Lastly, a wise older lady gave me some advice when I was younger that has stayed with me through the various chapters of my life: IN ACCEPTANCE IS PEACE

Whatever you believe is the right path to take, accept it’s limitations, devote yourself to it, and ‘reject everything else’.

The Teachers’ Strike: (Letter to concerned parent)

Dear J

I have had a good think about your letters to and  from the principal and union rep, read them twice and am ready to share my thoughts. First of all, good on you for communicating your concerns so well, graciously yet truthfully. Much better expressed directly than whingeing in the carpark. So here goes:

1. The 38 hr/week strike is an excellent idea for a school, maintaining school hours for kids and parents to continue life yet causing enough pain to get everyone's attention. However, I am not and never will be a striker on the basis that we in Aus have the best working conditions in the world, and striking for more pay because someone else has more or some brash pollie promised it is selfish and reckless, especially when the nation is drowning in debt that will take a decade of 'funding cuts' to repay.

2. Teachers DO get 11 weeks leave...you’re right!. When I was teaching I always liked to be well organised and prepared at the beginning of each term and would spend 2 or 3 days of the holidays preparing at school (4 or 5 in Jan). I was often there alone, tho some preferred working at home...maybe?? If you want to check this out you can drive by any school during the holidays and see how many cars are there. I rested in the holidays and I often told (still tell) teachers to do the same. Working with 20 + children all day every day brings a unique tedium and tiredness (yes, mothers??) and you need to be physically and mentally on top week one if you are to make it to week 10.

3. Teachers get several report writing days, P/T interview days and PD days off every year, (curriculum days or student free days). I totally dislike the idea of 'school hours' being called 'work hours'. Teachers should work 9 till 5 like any other job, and more if we want the title of 'professionals". Teachers certainly work hard, but so do all professionals and business people who work long hours without ‘compensation’.

4. Lastly, I actually agree with the idea of performance pay. I understand your principal’s point of staff disunity (jealousy?) but the truth is, there are good and bad teachers, and every parent knows who they are... hence the clamor at the start of the year to get little 'precious' into the good teacher's class!!! If other professions can come up with key performance indicators, so can teachers. I would suggest good classroom control, good student/teacher relationships, good student assessment, record keeping and feedback to child and parent, interesting and innovative lessons, and yes, good results, to name a few. Bad teachers drain our profession of the respect we so badly need to do our job well.

 There is so much more to be said for improving our schools today, and I refer you to an excellent article in the Weekend Australian (Feb 23) by Ben Jensen “Wrong Fix for Failing Schools: Raising classroom skills is far more important than raising money”

Stay on the job and keep yourself and others focused on the real issues. I repeat again, it’s not about money.

Yours,

Anne (retired teacher)

THERE you are!

If you attend any sort of social occasion and watch people entering the room, you will notice that most people fall into one of two categories. Those that walk in and communicate, “Here I am!” and those that walk in and communicate “There you are!”

The “Here I am people” are quite easy to spot as they are usually the ones doing most of the talking and very little of the eye contact. Their eyes tend to focus either on the middle distance or roam the room looking for someone more interesting/important to talk to (listen to them). If you make the grave mistake of asking them about their health, work, interests or whatever they will tell you at great length, never once noticing their listener’s glazed eyes or subtle body cues to escape. Somehow they have missed the simple rule of conversation: when there are 2 people conversing, each should do half the talking and half the listening.

 Take on the other hand the “There you are” people. The minute they see you, they give the impression their day has been made, that they want to hear all about your family, work or opinions and they have all day to listen, with rapt attention.  You feel an immediate friendship with these people from the moment you first meet and look forward to future encounters. If you ever find such a person, value them greatly by being a ‘there you are’ person as well, giving them the chance to do at least half the talking.

 Unfortunately, with the art of conversation dying and loneliness on the rise, the ‘here I am’s are rapidly on the increase. The sad thing for these people is that their chances of meaningful relationships dwindle with every verbose encounter. No-one wants to be around them.

When you are new to a town/group/church and trying to make new friends, 'there you are' people are pure sunshine.  It is not a pleasant experience to be a new person coming into an established social scene and finding yourself doing all the listening, or worse, totally ingored.

Churches often come under attack for being very unfriendly places for new people looking for a spiritual home. This shouldn't happen, but I don’t believe this situation is isolated to the church. Many Aussies are either shy or awkward in social settings and what may seem like rudeness may not be so. Nevertheless, if the church is to be a haven in a heartless world, we need to make a bigger effort in learning how to be ‘There you are’ people.

Bill Hybel’s book “Just Walk Across the Room” is a practical, easy read for would-be learners.

Computers in Classrooms

I have 2 little pictures in my family room: one says “teach me to count and I will number my blessings” and the other; “teach me to read and I will be forever free”.

It seems that all current discussion about education…. and there’s a lot of it… focuses on two other things: computers and money. The twittersphere, newspapers and carparks  are full of ‘experts’ wanting to solve all educational problems with more money (not sure what for!!) and laptops (ditto)  You would think these 2 factors are the only ones that set good schools apart from poor ones, that will turn today’s children into geniuses and put Australian back in the top 5 for  educational excellence..

I beg to differ. As a matter of fact, I strongly disagree.

Australian schools don’t need more money: they need better teachers with greater authority .

We don’t need to give laptops to every student:  we need to give their teachers respect for their work, time to prepare and assess well and support when they need to discipline.

For those parents who are being coerced into providing laptops for their children, or paying internet costs, let me ask: Have you thought through what a laptop will mean for your child, or do you just take at face value the common opinion that he/she will be left behind without one. (I use the word ‘common’ rather than ‘expert’ on purpose.) Think about the trouble you have with your child and the internet at home, then multiply it by 25 and you have some idea of what it’s like in a classroom for a teacher, even one who is computer trained. Even the best cannot supervise so many children with their voracious appetites for social networking and gaming.

Finland is widely known as having the best education in the world and it makes interesting reading to find out why. After checking several sites I found a common thread through the articles:

• Teaching is considered a highly prestigious profession, even above medical doctors. It is hard to get into and training is rigorous, both in content and practice.
• Teachers are highly respected by the community, parents and students
• Teachers are given authority and trust by the school and parents to do their jobs properly.
• Teachers are paid a similar salary to Australians but have less teaching hours, giving them more time for preparation and assessment. They know their students.
• The Finnish government spends $7,500 per student per year (which includes a free lunch). Australia spends $13,000
• There are no laptops in classrooms. Computers are provided in labs or libraries and are seen as research tools. Only one in five lessons require them.

Do your own homework, dear parent, before you join the throng wanting to put tempting technology into your child’s hands at school. The jury is still out on their usefulness and practicality. Talk to the wise and experienced teachers (someone with 10+ years in the classroom) before you pay out big dollars. One is not an expert on education if they haven’t done the hard yards in the classroom.

The best teaching is done through relationship. Ie a knowledgeable, wise and caring teacher who instructs, inspires, encourages, corrects and gives feedback to the young. This will never change, no matter how many gadgets and games we invent and try to flog off to schools to make learning more ‘fun’.

There really are only 4 fundamentals for your child to succeed at school: a good teacher, good books, a good attitude and your support. With these ‘tools’ in their ‘kit’ they could become whatever they want, maybe even a teacher!

Roots and Wings

There are two things we should give our children: one is roots and the other is wings." Hodding Carter

This old quote neatly sums up a parent’s job in the oh-so-short 18 years we have to do our job of raising secure, independent, happy young adults. I was fortunate to have parents who deeply planted my own roots in the soil of the Christian faith and that foundation has stood me in good stead for over 60 years.

Gardeners know that roots give us 2 things, stability and nourishment. In the old Bible story of the sower and the seed we learn that the strongest and most productive plants are the ones planted in good soil.

Parents these days are faced with so many choices from so many sources when it comes to providing ‘good soil’ in which to raise children. When values change with the date and the popular crowd is the source of all wisdom, teenagers can become rootless and purposeless, opting for pleasure and entertainment as their gods.

A child needs good roots to be prepared for successful independence and the Bible is your best source for wisdom and guidance.  Here are 10 really good rules to teach and model for starters:

       ·        No other gods before the God of Heaven and Earth

·         Don’t worship idols

·         Work 6 days and rest on the 7^th. Keep it holy.

·         Don’t disrespect God’s name by using it carelessly

·         Honour father and mother

·         Don’t lie

·         Don’t steal

·         Don’t commit adultery

·         Don’t murder

·         Don’t envy your neighbour’s ‘stuff’

A quick look at these age old commandments will soon tell you that if most people got even two or three of these right it would give today’s children something solid to stand on.

But, a child also needs wings if they are going to leave the nest successfully and take on the world with confidence. Here 10 suggestions for teaching children how to ‘fly’

• Unconditional love
• Household chores balanced with freetime
• opportunity to make choices suitable to their age
• Increasing responsibility tied to increasing trust
• Freedom to dream without ridicule
• Opportunities to explore and seek adventure
• Freedom to make mistakes and fail
• Praise…when deserved
• Affirmation for who they are
• Encouragement

Tim Keller’s new book “Counterfeit Gods” gives an excellent insight to the worship of worldy idols: money, success, sex, power, and the ultimate despair when they don’t deliver.

Gary Smalley and John Trent's classic “The Blessing” is still the best book I know for putting wind under a child’s wings.

Creating Beauty

Reading through an old Victoria magazine of my mothers is like taking a walk in a world of beauty. This old publication was full of beautiful gardens, homes, customs, clothes, people and writing. Of course, it was essentially a woman’s magazine, written for and by women. It inspired dreams.

Read most women’s magazines today and the emphasis given to beauty is predominantly personal or physical beauty. I agree that one of women’s gifts to the world is their personal beauty, but it is fleeting (if we are only talking about the skin deep variety), and only a small part of what we have to offer.

The most wonderful and lasting gift we have to offer the world is our ability to create beauty, both in places and in people. This gift is ours at birth, being made in the image of God as we are, and when it is nurtured and set free within us we have the potential to make the world a very lovely place.

Even the most humble home can be beautiful: let me count the ways!

clean and uncluttered, neat as a pin
smelling of home-cooked food,
decorated with colour, interesting treasures, keepsakes and photos,
a pretty garden,
gracious hospitality,
good conversation,
smiling, happy children.

I have seen many a shack in our travels that looked so inviting and friendly because of a pretty garden ( not to mention a mansion or two that looked sterile and cold) and been in a few that had all the ingredients above. I have talked to many women too, who make you want to be best friends straight away. There is a restful, confident radiance about them, a sense of peace with themselves, an unhurriedness. I’d rather be with these women and in their homes than any other, any day.

 Satan, the destroyer of beauty, has invented some pretty clever lies to rob women of the time and desire it takes to create beauty. Such as,

“It takes money to create a beautiful home…(you need more)”

“You can’t be a woman of influence/power/interest at home… (only working women have that)”

“No-one ever notices whether your home is beautiful or not… ( leave the mess, who cares anyway?)”

“Anyone can raise children… (you need to do something more challenging)”

“Money won’t buy you happiness, but it sure helps…(you need more)”

“It’s sexist to suggest only women are made to create beauty …. (men and women are just the same.)”

The temptation of career and money, power or fame is so great that many women are trading in their abilty to create beautiful places and people and things to chase personal ambition and reward. They are often full of rush and busyness, tired and rarely at peace. The world gets uglier and we all miss their beauty.