Your child's primary teacher is YOU.
‘primary’: adj: first in sequence; most important; basic; original
It often surprises me that many parents spend vast amounts of money on their children’s education but have failed to grasp that real influence on learning begins at home.
A child who comes to school with his/her character well formed is almost guaranteed to succeed, and we parents have 5 short years to teach them.
I thought I would write a list of the essential skills and values for a child starting school, but in the end there were really only three: language skills, responsibility and good work habits.
Language
Words are the building blocks of learning and the magic glue of our relationships . With words a child learns to communicate ideas, opinions, feelings, instructions, requests and, to receive them.
Language involves both speaking and listening and a wise parent models both. When we talk to our children, or read to them, we extend their vocabulary, knowledge and understanding. When we listen to them, we model attentiveness. To pay attention to someone is to pay them respect, and a child must be made to practice this often to prepare for school.
A child with good language skills is ready for school on day one.
Responsibility:
The 2 branches of responsibility are, ’It’s my job’ and ’It’s my fault’. These have been gradually eroded away in this age of entitlement to be replaced by, ’It’s someone else’s job’ and 'it’s not my fault’.
Responsibility has some admirable cousins called courage, honesty, fortitude and perseverance, traits that both boys and girls need in bucket loads to succeed in life. However, at the risk of being called sexist, I would say that boys need it most. There is something very right and very attractive about a man who steps up and says “I’ll take care of that”, whether it be a sinkful of dirty dishes, a disrespectful child or an outside threat to the family. Similarly, there is something very wrong and very sad about a young man who feels he is entitled to being looked after, provided for and protected by parents or government long after he should have been standing on his own 2 feet.
The value of responsibility is caught more than taught, and it’s learnt very early, in the home. A boy who constantly hears Dad saying “I’ll take care of that” will fare well at school, be a delight to his teachers and most likely never become a bully or the victim of one.
Work habits
The old saying “a job worth doing is worth doing well” still holds true for those who wish to succeed. Thoroughness, excellence and creation of beauty are habits that we can help a child develop in even the smallest of jobs: setting the table, making a bed, cleaning a bedroom, sweeping paths. We are made in the image of an excellent creator and it follows that we should find pleasure and pride in doing our work well. I have had everything from great to average intelligences pass through my classroom but the constant ingredient for success has been good work habits, not brains.
The future of our society will be in the hands of our children. They need excellent primary teachers.
