Recently I had the pleasure
of speaking to a young lady who took her responsibilities as a mother very
seriously. Though tertiary educated, talented and confident, she had recently
taken an overnight job at a local supermarket filling shelves in order to help
the family budget. Although she could have easily taken a better paying day job
by putting her children into professional care, she refused to do so on the
grounds that it was her job to raise and train her small children, not others. She
would make the sacrifice so that they didn’t need to. A helpful young dad was certainly
a bonus in making it all work.
I know many young mums
making a similar sacrifice, putting careers on hold so that their children have
the best possible chance to grow up healthy in mind and spirit as well as body.
In his book “The Reason for
God”, Tim Keller describes parenthood this way:
“Children come into the world in a condition of complete dependence. They
cannot operate as self-sufficient, independent agents unless their parents give
up much of their own independence and freedom for years. If you don’t allow
your children to hinder your freedom in work and play at all, and you only get
to your children when it doesn’t inconvenience you, your children will grow up
physically only. In all sorts of other ways they will remain emotionally needy,
troubled and over-dependent. The choice is clear. You can either sacrifice
your freedom or theirs.”
I am constantly disturbed,
as I watch the nightly news, by the overwhelming and growing number of ‘emotionally
needy and troubled’ youth. They will soon be outnumbering the ‘self-sufficient,
independent agents’ in classrooms, making teaching an increasingly hazardous
occupation. How sad!
Children don’t need more
education, special programs, welfare, money, therapy, counselors or skate parks. They need a mum and a dad who are there when they need them,
especially the first 5 years of life, at least. It’s not long, in the grand
scheme of a life, and your sacrifice may well lead to your greatest achievement:
strong, independent sons and daughters.
